O V E R W H E L M E D
…but in a good way. I’m overwhelmed by gratitude. By grace. By so many things!
I wish it happened more often, but it’s seems like the moments that stop you in your tracks reveal how lost you’ve been and how amazing God is just can’t come often enough.
For those who know me, you’ll know better than this the depth of it, but I have essentially been working my butt off for years for the “promise” and hope and dream of something that’s always seemed just out of reach. I got used to it and accepted that that’s the way it would be. It’s been incredibly hard (I’ll probably explain more about that in the book I’m writing). The struggle has been very real…and yet I clung to this hope and promise that God was preparing me for something better/bigger.
I have turned down many “opportunities” that would have accelerated my career, set me up financially, and even given me fame…but they all, in some way or another, asked me to sacrifice my integrity. But last week I got an offer that brought me to tears, and a contract to go with it. By the middle of this month I will be consulting a company that values my integrity, opinion, experience, and never-settle mentality based on observation over the years.
I don’t share this to brag. I share this because of how it effected me, and because it didn’t hit me immediately. In fact, this week has been a major struggle because the offer challenges my status quo. It means I don’t have to prove myself – I am already valued; I don’t have to earn a position – it’s already been given; I didn’t do anything to deserve it other than stay true to myself and what I believe, which is that God is good, God provides, God knows and He has better for me than anything I could ask of Him or imagine (See Ephesians 3:20). I know that God will never leave me or reject me (See Joshua 1:5). I am secure no matter my position or status (See Romans 8:38-39).
But a realization hit me: I am having trouble receiving this “gift.” A part of me wants to keep striving; earning; proving, but I can’t–it’s been done; given; promised. All I can do is receive, be grateful, and be who I have been fashioned, trained and matured to be; working not out of need to perform, but out of gratitude for the position and favor, leading others by example of service, not striving.
Then I realized something more — this is grace.
This is how God accepts us. He died to save us; to have relationship with us; to make it possible for us to know Him…and we can do nothing to earn it! Nothing we do could make us good enough. All we have to offer Him is our mess, but He loves us anyway. He gently leads us to a place in life where we are prepared to receive His love. For some that’s earlier and others later in life, but to those who accept, He gives freely!! I admit it–I still struggle with the weight of that understanding sometimes. It’s mind blowing!
And if I’m totally transparent, as I aim to be, I confess I am ashamed that I struggle with accepting this career position but I don’t seem to struggle with God’s gift. How much I have taken the greater gift for granted! God is so good, and I still struggle to love Him well. But then He knows that too, and gives more grace, and His peace floods in. He knew that even a year ago I wasn’t ready. I may have taken the job for granted or assumed I had earned it, when in reality, everything that has prepared me for this position has been God given and purposeful all along. How incredible is that! And this isn’t just my story, it’s the story of anyone who entrusts their life to Him!
So now, I express this to you because I want you to experience the same peace. Learn who God is; know Him and you will know peace. Seek Him and you’ll find Him. This is Advent season after all: the season set apart to remind us of the gift of Jesus (His birth reminds us of his life and eventual sacrificial death on our behalf which made it possible for us to be in right relationship with God).
How does this relate to fitness?
This blog is more personal, more spiritual, and maybe isn’t anything you expected or maybe even wanted to read, but the reason is this: I could talk about fitness tips and weight loss tricks or other superficial things (and I still do/will), or I could dig deeper and talk about the bigger picture: what really matters.
Yes, Cause Fitness is about fact based fitness and health and nutrition information and education and empowerment and encouragement, but it’s also about getting fit in the deeper places and challenging you to get out of your comfort zone to get to where the growth happens.
Because more than 6-pack abs and a faster mile pace, what we truly need is fitness of the soul.
Love you all dearly. Please feel free to leave questions, thoughts or prayer requests in the comments below, and go #CauseFitness!